This is me (in case u hadn't guessed!)

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Boppys & Binkies & Bumbos - Oh My!

As many of you may already know we recently had two new additions to our family. Mom had two babies at once, Matthew, who I call Happy and Amy, who I call Screechy. Matthew is called Happy because he is a very happy fellow, always smiling and laughing and cooing. Amy is called Screechy because she screeches like a banshee and is usually in a very very bad mood (kind of like the cat!)

When a human has two babies at once that is called twins. When I was born to my doggy mom I was one of ten puppies. Thank goodness my human mom did not have ten babies because two is bad enough!

When Happy and Screechy were first growing inside Mom I did not have a clue they were in there. I just knew that all of a sudden my mom was puking her guts out day and night! Now I am known as a bit of a frequent puker myself (we German Sheps have sensitive tums!) but mom was a one woman puke fest! Unfortunately for her it was around this same time that I started having several bouts of explosive doggy diarhea, I'm talking major watery Hershey squirts! Poor mom, it was coming out of one end of me and the other end of her! But even little things would cause mom to puke, like if she smelled perfume or laundry detergent or if Daddy cooked us a nice roasted chicken for dinner! Or if I happened to put my lovely squidgy slimy piece of rawhide on her lap. So Happy and Screechy were the cause of lots of urping in our house.

Finally the barfing stopped and moms tummy started to grow. And grow and grow and grow. I got shouted at a lot because mom said I was in her way and she couldn't see her feet, or her knees or her hips. All she could see was the giant tum that was Happy and Screechy, all scrunched up together inside.

One night there was great commotion in our house just after we'd all settled down for bed. Mom was up and dad was up and they were trying to wake up big sis Maddie. They kept talking about how mom's water had broke which I didn't understand then and I still don't understand to this day. How does one "break" water???? At any rate, suddenly everyone left the house in the middle of the night and I was left alone! That had NEVER happened before in my lifetime so I sort of freaked out a little. Thank goodness my cat Bella was here to calm my nerves a little. I chewed her up a bit then we snuggled up and slept the rest of the night. In the morning dad was back but just long enough to let me out to pee then off he went again. Mom was nowhere to be seen which was strange indeed. This craziness went on for 4 days and I was nearly out of my mind wondering what had happened to my mom! I thought maybe she'd run away or something, but no, the truth was she was at some place called a "hospital" where she gave birth to Happy and Screechy, my new little bro and sis.

When mom finally came home I went completely berserk, crying and kissing her all over! I was soooo happy to see her! She gave me lots of cuddles and kisses although I noticed she was moving kind of slow and her giant tummy was gone. Then dad brought in Happy and Screechy and put them in the baby crib still in their car seats so I could check them out. Well I'm here to tell you, this dog had never ever seen such a weird thing as those two babies! I had no idea what they were! Were they toys? I didn't think so, they were moving and making tiny noises and had a smell to them. I growled a little bit because I was unsure what I was dealing with here and dad gave me a thunk and told me to be good. That told me it was NOT okay to chew on these things, whatever they were. Gradually I came to realize they were tiny people and apparently they were here to stay. Pretty much right away I realized two other things: they were LOUD and they were SMELLY. The smelly I didn't mind so much (even grabbed me a diaper or two to chew on when mom wasn't looking!) but the loud was another thing entirely! Screechy especially would constantly emit a sound ten thousand times worse then nails on a chalkboard! I had no choice but to throw back my head and howl right along with her. At first mom and dad thought it was funny when I howled, later on it just got me another thunk on the head. Which brought me to another realization: it's okay for babies to make loads of noise but not me! Not fair at all but that's how it is!

When you have babies in your house they come with a lot of junk, all of which I am not allowed to touch or chew on, which stinks! You have Boppy's, which are these great soft pillows that cradle the babies while they sleep. Then you have Binkies, which are so fun to chew and suck on!! We also have Bumbo seats, which are made out of this lovely squidgy soft rubber that would be soooo nice to chew. But I'm not allowed near any of it! All I can do is look longingly at them and dream of the mess I could make...

It's different now that we have babies in the house. It's noisier and smellier and sometimes my sleep is disturbed. Happy pulls my fur and drools on me and Screechy breaks my eardrums ten times a day, but truth be told I'm starting to get sort of used to having them around. I like making them laugh and smile and I like kissing their drooly faces and licking up the spit up from the floor. And mom says soon they will start eating baby food, so THAT'S got to be a good thing!

Yes, I miss the peace and quiet and I wish I could lay on the boppys and chew the binkies and bumbos and drink milk from the bottles but I do love my new bro and sis, we have an awesome family and something tells me it's just going to get better and better!

Wags and kisses,


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